What is this doing here? What’s this name for? What happened at the hospital? What did the doctors say? Did the spinal adjustment go well? How did he manage the flight? Did they say when they would take the trach out? And how are you doing? Can you rest and recharge a little?
Tons and tons of questions come at me from all over, and I often question myself as well. But God’s plan for me isn’t to bombard myself with questions but to shift the focus from myself, from my child solely onto Him. This blog, though my life situation, reveals His glory. This blog isn’t about me, not even about Vince, not about the struggles, but only about Him, God and His Son, Jesus. He is the One who gives salvation daily, recharges a mother daily, who, measured by human standards, has received great difficulties in her life. But it is important to know that with God’s standards these difficulties are blessings! Blessings which help me get to know God even better, and He is my true Friend, my Father and my Partner!
“‘Because he loves me’, says the Lord, ‘I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will
call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him…’” Psalms 91:14-15
Glory to You for Everything in my life! Thank you for teaching me and giving me wisdom, so I can see the works of Your hands in my life. You said that if anyone had troubles in their lives, they should pray and put down their burdens at Your feet, and You will care for them. Lord, I realized with the guidance of your Holy Spirit that prayer is nothing other than praying. Praising, worship. But how can someone worship when the world’s burdens come crashing down? And You have taught this to me too dear God! Your mercy is endless! You have taught me to count the blessings in my life and to give thanks for the things I received as a gift. I am thankful for Vince’s pranks, for my husband’s endurance, for my parents’ provision, for my friends’ support, and suddenly my eyes are open wide and I start seeing the blessings in my life:
One of my greatest fears in terms of Vince is if he will have a partner when I am not around anymore who he can share his heart’s secrets with, who will help him overcome his physical obstacles. I have cried a lot because of this, but when I glorify God and give Him thanks for everything from my heart, He allows me to peek into His perfect plan! It is a miracle that a little girl joined Vince’s kindergarten class a few weeks after the school year started. She has AMC as well, she is very talkative, and I can barely keep up with the events, everything goes so fast! In one moment I am already on Vince’s very first date, because the little girl invited him to collect fall leaves in the park, and in the next she is a guest in our home, and we dance together in the living room. Oh dear Lord, Your love is so great! These days I keep catching You as You indulge me. Thank You!
“If you say, ’The Lord is my refuge,’ and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent. For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways.”
Last week we flew to Hamburg. We had to go there again for Vince’s spinal rod adjustment and other checkups. God is simply perfect! He blessed us again! We have had trouble figuring out how to take Vince to the bathroom when we travel. We have been using a sitting corset that can be fastened to the toilet, and my mom has modified it, so we could fold it into a suitcase. When we go to the bathroom, it’s a 20-minute procedure at least, and both my husband and I are involved, because I cannot lift and undress Vince at the same time. On the airplane we only had 5 minutes to do all that, and the bathroom there doesn’t fit three people all at once. But the proverbial light went off in my head: my husband lifted Vince at the door, I pulled down his pants, backed into the toilet, sat down on it and put Vince into my lap. Ready to pee in one square meter! Hallelujah!
I know I should be broken and worn out, because I give beyond my strength and I don’t have my annual vacation I could take. But God budgets my time so precisely! At night He wakes me up when Vince needs to be turned or needs suctioning. In the morning I talk to Him while I’m still half asleep. Throughout the mornings He gives me time to run errands or go swimming, exercising while Vince is in the kindergarten. In the afternoons I take care of my normal and extra motherly duties. Once a week He helps me make it to Bible class. And several times I week I get to talk about Him at the snack bar of the kindergarten, at the butcher’s or over the phone to another mom. Last time He even managed for the hairdresser to mess up my haircut. On my way to another hairdresser’s I ran into an acquaintance and I told her how we had received a breathing support machine out of the Grace of God in only two weeks during the Christmas holidays, when the basic wait period for sleep therapy is three months.
Glory to You for everything Lord! Please give me wisdom, so I can continue to see the work of Your hands in my life! May Your will be done! If I have ever sinned, please do not remember it and give me eternal life!
“Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion.” Psalms 103:2-4